Captain Morgan of the Winnipeg Transit

Love this, from Laura:

One day last summer I was bussing down portage on my way to work. The bus was kind of crowded, and there were only a few seats left at the back of the bus. This guy got on, sat down across from me and started trying to talk to a couple people including myself. We ignored him because he was drunk and fishing for someone to start a fight with. When he realized he wasn't getting anywhere reached into his back back and pulled out a 66 of captains and just started drinking. I got off the bus shortly after and just walked to work from there.

Spiders! On the Bus!

Here's a story from Kenton:

A few months ago, I found myself sitting behind Little Miss Muffet on a Winnipeg Transit bus.

I knew it was her, because she was wearing a sleeveless summer shirt, sensible shoes, and a big, black spider on the back of her neck.

No kidding. 

I looked a bit closer to make sure it wasn't a tattoo - it wasn't - and I weighed my options. Should I: 

• Brush it off;
• Blow on it;
• Squish it with my hand;
• Hit it with something;
• Tell her;
• Wait and see;
• Do absolutely nothing?

Having touched strangers' necks in the past and regretted it, I settled on just telling her, which seemed like a decent middle-ground thing to do. 

"Excuse me, young lass," I said, "but there appears to be a spider on your neck."

She sprung into the middle of the aisle, jumped up and down, screamed "Jesus Christ!" and flung the poor bastard across the bus. He never knew what hit him.

She dropped back onto her tuffet and hyperventilated.

I got off the bus, and as it pulled away, I whispered, "And she didn't even get a chance to thank me."

Transit Chivalry

Here's a positive story from JG about a nice old-school gentleman on the bus, when does this happen?

Many years ago in the spring, riding the 16 to Southdale I stepped onto a full bus. The only available seat was covered in mud from someone's shoes. The teenaged boy sitting on the other half of the seat was a true gentleman. He looked at me & then covered the seat with his duo-tang so that I could sit without getting mud everywhere.